We all carry what are called masculine and feminine energies. Masculine energy is that part of us that takes action, the “doer”, the part of us that is externally focused. The feminine is that part of us that is creative, intuitive, the part of us that knows how to “be” and is internally focused. The masculine has logic and action, the feminine, wisdom and strength. The ideal is to have these energies balanced in us and in our relationships.
Women have amazing power! I’m not talking about power out in the world, success, money or stature in society. I’m talking about our true feminine power. We are the givers of life, we know how “to be”, to flow, to intuit, to dream, to create and…we are the spiritual teachers of men. We women have wisdom, strength, patience, and the capacity to create a loving space when others are in need. These qualities are our sacred gifts to be used with an open heart in all our relationships. However, without the masculine in us we would be dreamers without substance because we wouldn’t be able to execute our ideas in the world.
The power of men is that they are strong mentally, are logical and solution and action oriented. They go out into the world “to do”, to face whatever challenges they must in order to provide. They have the capacity to do what it takes to make sure their loved ones are taken care of, to protect them physically and to provide financially. However, without the feminine, the masculine creates action propelled by force and logic often ignoring wisdom, intuition or feelings.
How can a relationship bring these two energies into healthy balance? First, let’s acknowledge that it is not easy because we live in a masculine energy. Our western society is predominantly masculine and when the masculine is out of balance the many negative consequences range from unhappy lives and marriages to the devastations of war.
Women today are overburdened and overwhelmed by living and working in a predominantly masculine world of thinking and doing. It is no wonder that some women have little psychic energy left to access their feminine, to “be” the loving sacred space that only she can provide.
Men are doing what they are hard wired to do. They are going out into a masculine environment to do whatever needs to be done in order to provide for their loved ones. Besides the masculine getting reinforced all day, men have no clue how to access their feminine because it is unfamiliar to them and not encouraged by society.
The truth is that we all need to access our feminine. I find that we women get into trouble when we meet our man’s logic with logic and his force with our anger. We forget in the moment that men are not versed in the language of feelings and we get frustrated, angry and disappointed when they don’t “get it”.
Don’t make it personal….instead, access your profound wisdom, your patience and compassion and your intuition. Men provide physical safety, it is up to women to create a safe psychic “space”, a nurturing environment that welcomes the man when he comes back from being a man. I know that this is asking a lot of women. It is very difficult today because women are out in that same world all day long too. My hope in this article is that by bringing attention to this topic, it will open a dialogue for couples within which they can find their own solution.
What is imperative is for us to understand that these differences are real and to work with them. It is all too easy to stay stuck in unhappy relationships just because we don’t understand that it is our hard wiring that isn’t in balance. And, yes, it feels like there is more responsibility on us women. We are the feminine and we can teach our men to access their feminine by accessing ours, by having patience and compassion for them, by approaching them in our wisdom and strength, by teaching them what we need and want rather than demanding or expecting what they are not hard wired to understand. We need to bring the Divine Feminine back into our lives for our sakes, for our children and for the world. Let’s start by doing it at home.